The morning’s sun poured through the eastern windows of the Presidential Suite. Sarah rolled over onto Thor’s side of the bed, kissed him lovingly, and thanked him for being there. Just as quickly she stood, walked into her bathroom, and began to ready herself for the day ahead. Their guests would be arriving within the hour. Thor had invited the Israeli contingent of Team Uniform to the suite.
Breakfast was served by the hotel staff - Palestinians - around the black dining room table. It was next to his room, not hers, but they had shut both doors, trying to be discrete. Sarah wasn’t embarrassed, for nothing inappropriate had happened, but she didn’t want others jumping to conclusions. They would anyway, Thor knew.
With the Arabs present, they watched what they said more closely than what they were eating. The four Israelis were obviously eager to learn what had happened at the hospital. Thor and Sarah both wanted to know if Newcomb had made any progress with the authorities.
Turns out he had. Isaac had managed to reach the Prime Minister at home. After apologizing for the condition of his van, he had told him about Mary, Sarah, and Thor. He in turn placed a call to the head of Israel’s Adoption Services. There were advantages to celebrity.
The breakfast dishes were cleared, and the Palestinians made their way back down to the hotel kitchen. The Admiral called the meeting to order.
"Thank you for coming. I know how diligently you’ve prepared, and I’m grateful. We have a serious problem," he announced, looking at each of them. "And there is no painless solution. Thousands more will die before this is resolved." These were not encouraging words. "My hope, however, is that we can prevent the deaths of millions. And make no mistake; that’s our fate if we hesitate, if we’re afraid to deal with Islam. There is no chance our present course will lead to peace."
He placed both hands on the table. "I believe I know the answer," he said as their eyes widened. "But before I share it with you, I need to understand Muslims better." He studied their faces. "While I am certain more Marys will be butchered by these deluded fools, we must do everything in our power to limit the carnage."
They all reached for their books and notes. They understood that this was why they’d been gathered. They had dedicated themselves to this very thing, and they were ready, although not eager, to report what they had learned.
Isaac got down to business. "In our opinion, Islam, Allah, and Muhammad are one. When you understand Muhammad, this whole sorry mess comes into focus."
"That’s right. So yesterday afternoon, moments before those two boys tried to blast their way into paradise, we were talking about the Prophet’s first vision," Josh said.
"It was in a cave, late one night. He was forty, married to a sixty-year-old woman - a rich widow from two previous marriages. She was in the caravan biz, right?" Adams recapped.
"Yes. And w-we know that Muhammad’s dad was n-named Abd-Allah, ‘slave to Allah,’ after the Ka’aba’s m-moon-rock god. His life had been spared b-because his father negotiated a deal w-with some occult types."
"Before we move into new territory," Sarah interrupted, "there’s so much to say, I suggest we set some ground rules."
Thor, Isaac, Moshe, Yacob, and Josh nodded in agreement.
"I propose that we review Muhammad’s life in chronological order, and limit our source material to the Qur’an and the Sunnah - the Traditions or Hadith, and the oldest biographies - no speculation."
"Agreed. The p-portrait is hideous enough." Moshe stared at his shattered hand as he spoke.
"Okay, then. By way of recap, our first day here we discussed the embarrassment of the Dome of the Hoofie Print. There are two things I want to add to that story. As recorded in the eighth chapter of the Hadith’s Book of Creation, Aisha, the Prophet’s youngest wife, said, ‘Magic was worked on Muhammad so that he fancied himself doing things that he never did.’ She said the Prophet told her he was ‘bewitched’ by devils. Second, in chapter five of the same book, she declared that Muhammad never saw Allah, ever, and that anyone who claimed he had was a liar. Therefore, Muhammad’s Celestial Journey to meet Allah was a fantasy, and the shrine commemorating it stands as a monument to that deception."
Thor stared out the window, watching the morning sun glisten off that very same delusion.
Sarah looked down at her notes. "Next, we discussed the absurdity of Muhammad’s revisionist account of Adam and his search for the navel of the earth, the white Ka’aba stone that turned black from being fingered by menstruating women. He said Noah, as you may recall, circumambulated the stone seven times as Adam’s body floated on it. Mind you, the Ark was a barge, rudderless, propulsion-less, totally unnavigable, stones don’t float, and Adam had been dead for centuries."
She glanced down again. "Third, we discussed the nature of the Ka’aba. It was a small, crude pagan temple with over three hundred idols - most of them rocks. The Black Stone was Allah’s. Muhammad was born within a quarter mile of the shrine. His father and his father’s father were custodians of the Ka’aba, and Muhammad himself worshiped the pagan gods, observing their rituals. He incorporated all of them into Islam. So he knew the truth, but instead he chose to deceive."
Sarah was wound up. "By saying Abe nearly sacrificed Ishmael, he purposely recast Jewish history and Hebrew scriptures to give a pagan shrine and his fledgling new religion credibility. There is no chance that Abraham was ever anywhere near Mecca. Not only was the deception purposeful," she said, "giving us an insight into the soul of the perpetrator, but this very act later caused Muhammad to hate Jews, and ultimately led the world to the fix we’re in today."
"Right on the dollar," Yacob misspoke. "A billion people bow toward a rock that Muhammad elevated to the status of supreme deity." He rubbed the gash on his neck.
"The downfall of Islam begins with Muhammad’s birth," Isaac began. Muslims say the would-be Messenger was born in A.D. 570, right after his dad, Abd-Allah, died in Yathrib. His ‘loving’ mother, Amina, immediately gave him up to be suckled by a stranger, a Bedouin woman. So the fatherless infant boy was carried off into the desert."
"Don’t tell me," Adams said. "His biographers conjured up some miracles to make all of this look more prophet-like."
"Oh, yeah.." Josh, sitting in his wheelchair to the Admiral’s right, was buried in books and notes. His body had been bruised by Islamic terror, but not his spirit. "The biographers claim that a couple of shining white beings threw the boy onto the ground, cut him open, ripped out his heart, washed it, and then stuck it back into his chest. If only they had," Josh mused. "Muhammad, by the way, says the same thing happened to him again, right over there." He pointed toward the Temple Mount." His notes read: Book of Merits 42:1589.
"That," Isaac interrupted, "is a triple whammy for the Muslims.’ First, it’s utterly ridiculous and makes them look silly. Second, it’s Satanic, since the removal and washing of organs is an important part of occult ritual worship - the kind of thing his father and grandfather were into. And third, Muhammad admitted that he was not capable of any miracles."
"In fact," Yacob jumped back in, "in Qur’an 21:5 we read that one of the many arguments used by Muhammad’s critics at the time was that he couldn’t do miracles. Since the Judeo-Christian Prophets could, and did, they said he didn’t measure up. If he had been involved in a miracle, or could do one, all he would have had to do to silence his critics was to explain the ones that had taken place, or simply do one. But no."
"Isaac finished the story of his childhood. "The Bedouin woman brought the boy back to his mother in Mecca when he was six. But before the year was out, she died. A slave girl took care of him for a while before his grandfather finally took an interest. And even that is potentially disturbing, for the biographers say that Abdul Muttalib was, and I quote, ‘extremely fond of him and used to constantly pet him and play with him.’ But he died a couple of years later, and Prophet-to-be was handed off to Abu Talib, an uncle, his father’s brother. Needless to say, Muhammad had one whacked-out childhood. It’s not hard to understand why he was so insecure."
Sarah was sitting to Thor’s left with her back to the window, enjoying the sun’s warmth. "Long story short, he grows up, and at twenty he marries a rich forty-something widow named Khadija, his employer no less. They have six kids, nearly all dying young. Both sons die while still infants. He spends a lot of time at night hanging out in caves over the next twenty years, which isn’t surprising, considering his life up to this point. Then it happened: one night in the month of Ramadan 610, he claimed he had a vision."
Joshua and Moshe rolled their wheelchairs in a little closer.
"He says that out of nowhere, deep in this cave, while he’s all alone, a ‘vision’ told him to read. ‘But I cannot read,’ the illiterate Mo replied. Must have been a case of mistaken identity."
"So what happened next?" Thor asked.
"It got n-nasty." Moshe had the Hadith open to the first chapter of the Book of Revelation. "Unlike real prophets before him, Mo got p-pummeled. He couldn’t b-breathe. He was told to r-read a couple more times, each time insisting he couldn’t, followed by another b-bout with the belligerent vision. It nearly squeezed the life out of him. He was a-agitated, mentally confused, to the point he - in his own words - said, ‘I will go to the top of the mountain and throw m-myself down, that I may kill myself and be at rest.’"
"The first suicide bomber." Thor exclaimed. "No wonder they’re so screwed up.
"Oh, it gets worse," Yacob said. "In terror, he starts hallucinating. He sees a man so tall, his feet straddle the horizon. More worried than ever, he hightails it back to momma, his sixty-year-old wife. Again in his words, ‘I went into Khadija and sat by her thigh and drew close to her.’ Mind you, he’s forty at the time. Afraid he’s going out of his mind, he tells her that he’s being possessed by an evil spirit, a jinn - what we’d call a demon. As we’ve learned, sorcerers, diviners, and other forms of occult worshipers were very common in Mecca, and Mo was quite familiar with the idea of paranormal phenomena like this. He was convinced he’d had an encounter with the Dark Side of the Farce."
"That explains a lot of things, doesn’t it?" Thor laughed.
"Unfortunately for little girls like Mary and thousands before her, Khadija convinced her hubby that it wasn’t a devil after all." Normally a fan of strong women, Sarah wasn’t very impressed by this one. "After a while Muhammad calmed down, pacified to the point that Khadija could get up and wrap him in her cloak. Then she darted out the door and ran to her cousin, a fellow who Muhammad claims translated the Christian Gospels - at Allah’s bidding - into Hebrew.
"That makes no sense at all. Hebrew was a dead language by then, and the Gospels were spoken in Aramaic and written in Greek. Translating them from Greek into Arabic would have at least made sense. But Muhammad was illiterate, so what did he know? Unfortunately, Khadija’s cousin, a blind geezer named Waraqa Abdul Uzza, was so old his tombstone had to be backdated. This poor guy gets an earful from Muhammad’s hopeful wife and says, ‘If all you have said is true’ - fat chance on that - ‘the spirit has appeared to him, as it appeared long ago to Moses.’ Alzheimer’s maybe."
"C’mon, Sarah, there’s just no way. The beginnings of Islam can’t be that full of dumb mistakes. You’re improvising, right?"
She found her copy of the Hadith and read, "The Book of Revelation; Muhammad is speaking about the first man to identify him as a prophet. He says, ‘Waraqa Abdul Uzza, who during the Period of Ignorance became a Christian, used to write with Hebrew letters. He would write the Gospel in Hebrew as much as Allah wished him to....’" She handed the book to Thor so he could read the rest of the account.
Adams shook his head. "Okay, you’re not improvising."
Sarah returned to her notes. "Several things bear mentioning. First, Moses met directly with God, not some menacing vision. Second, the biographers, Ibn Ishaq and Tabari, claim that the spirit Mo encountered was none other than Gabriel, the angel who played such a large role in Jewish revelation. Unfortunately, Mo doesn’t say anything about Gabe being in the cave in his Qur’an. And third, if it was Gabriel, why was he squeezing the life out of him? And why would someone want to commit suicide after meeting with an angel, a messenger sent from God?"
"It’s because to Muhammad, angels are instruments for killing, not compassion," Josh said. "But we’re getting ahead of our story."
Isaac, sitting at the far end of the table, shook his head. "What we’re saying is that Khadija, not her husband, was the first Muslim. Muhammad was her first convert. In fact, Khadija’s so important, within weeks of her death, Islam goes from being a silly religion to a menacing doctrine."
Adams breathed heavily. "Muhammad strikes out in the first inning. He has a deplorable childhood. His father and grandfather are occult idol worshipers, bigwigs in the local pagan religious establishment. Then he strikes out again in the second inning with the revelation from hell. This is a disaster, so far."
"The third inning’s not much better," the Major shared. "After the initial vision, it’s years before Muhammad’s plugged in again. In fact, he never has another wrestling match."
Adams stared at him. "Wait a minute! I thought that’s all the Qur’an was - hundreds of pages of alleged revelations."
"They weren’t exactly ‘revelations,’ Thor. Muhammad claimed he received impressions he had to unscramble. He described the experience as the ‘ringing of a bell’. It clanged in his head. He typically climbed under a cloak when it started, shaking and sweating profusely."
"Sounds a lot like epilepsy."
"Well, who knows what it was, but there were no more bouts with the supernatural. That one nasty experience in the cave was all she wrote. From that point, on it’s all about the ringing of bells. He says they continued until he was able to decipher the message. Unfortunately for his credibility though, his unscramblings seem to be timely justifications for whatever he was scheming to do. As a matter of fact, my friends," Isaac said, looking around the black dining table, "I’m convinced he just made them up. And those he didn’t invent, he plagiarized from Jewish oral traditions. But as we get into his story, I want you to be the judge."
"I’ll give you a classic example," Yacob said. He was sitting next to Sarah, his back to the window. "After it becomes apparent he’s not going to get any more of these cave visions, he becomes despondent, or as his biographers say, ‘fearful’ and ‘anxious.’ After all, his sixty-five-year-old wife has been bragging to everybody in town that her hubby is a prophet - just like Moses. So what do you think he does? Right. He makes one up. After three years of being ignored by Allah, he claims that he’s deciphered a message that says, ‘Your Lord has not forsaken you, nor does he despise you.’ Qur’an 93 goes on to say that Mo will be ‘content’ and ‘enriched’. Pretty convenient, I’d say."
Sarah interrupted, "Again, no godly insights, just ‘you’re my guy, and working together, this gig’s gonna be profitable.’ Muhammad says it this way in the Hadith, number 224, ‘The booty has been made lawful for me, yet it was not lawful to anyone before me.’ A bit full of himself, in the same passage, he also claimed, ‘The earth has been made for me.’
"Good grief." Thor gazed out the window.
"The majority of the surahs that follow tell us that the Apostle’s critics, the Meccans, are stupid for not buying into his Prophet act, and as a result they’re going to roast in hell. In various forms, there may be a thousand such verses. Then we have a series based upon Judeo-Christian themes and events, positive, yet positively butchered versions of Biblical characters and accounts. If we were to reorder them chronologically, these would be followed by some rather nasty surahs, ones that say Christians and Jews should be hurried on their way to hell. Allah’s Messenger goes from trying to emulate and win over the ‘People of the Book,’ as he calls us, to wanting us dead."
"For e-example, in Qur’an 98, Allah s-says, ‘Surely the unbelievers among the People of the Book w-will abide in the h-hell fire. They are the worst of creatures.’"
Josh had something to add. "By the way, Mo’s Allah has a thing for hell. One hundred and nine of the one hundred and fourteen surahs in the Qur’an speak of punishment. Over ninety-five percent of ’em. Somebody obviously had an unhappy childhood."
Moshe moved on. "What’s the h-hardest part about t-telling a lie?"
"Remembering what you said," Sarah answered.
"Well, that’s w-what happened to the Messenger Boy. Muhammad regularly f-forgot the text of p-past revelations, or s-simply changed them. At times he c-conjured up new ones that contradicted others, c-canceling them out. But he had a ready excuse for that too."
Sarah smiled. She knew it. "Qur’an 2:106." She quoted it from memory. ‘Whenever We cancel a verse or throw it into oblivion, We bring one which is better.’ Of course, Muhammad had a more colorful explanation. When he was chided for forgetting what he’d said, he explained that the Qur’an was more fleeting than a runaway camel."
"But seriously," Joshua laughed, regaining his composure. "Since the Qur’an is alleged to be divine revelation, it means that over the course of twenty years, the all-knowing creator rock of the universe changed his mind a bunch of times."
"The second problem is his use of ‘We’. The plural pronoun is used throughout the Qur’an when speaking of Allah, yet Mo makes a big deal of the fact that there’s only one God - no Trinity. He says that would be paganism. So what’s up with ‘We’?"
"Maybe Allah’s schizophrenic. He’s got multiple personalities ’cause he speaks in first, second, and third person, singular and plural. He refers to himself as: Lord, Allah, I, Me, We, Us, Him, He, My, and Our."
Sarah laughed. "He also makes a really big deal about Jesus not being God, saying fifty times that it is beneath God to beget a son. Yet then in Qur’an 66 he says that the virgin Mary was ‘filled with God’s spirit.’ Allah says ‘We breathed into her a new life from Us.’ Sounds like a direct contradiction to me. He also says, by the way, that he and Jesus have different mothers but the same father. It seems our hero was easily confused. Want proof? In Qur’an 2:136 Allah calls Jesus ‘Christ’ - Greek for Messiah."
"Is this a religion or a comedy?" the Admiral asked.
"It’s a Greek tragedy," Sarah moaned. "There are only flawed characters and a lifetime of losing. Even when these guys finally win, they do it the wrong way."
Sarah had commandeered the conversation. "Speaking of losing, the only guarantee of paradise is to die a martyr, fighting for either Allah or Muhammad. In surah 47, Allah says, ‘When you meet with the unbelievers in battle, smite their necks until you overpower them, then hold them in bondage...taking a ransom. Allah will not allow the deeds of those who are killed in His Cause to go to waste, and will admit them into Paradise.’ And then, Qur’an 61 says, ‘May I offer you a bargain which will save you from a painful punishment? Come to believe in Allah and His Apostle and struggle in the Cause of Allah with your property and your lives. He will forgive you your sins and admit you into Paradise.’"
"Believe in him?" Adams asked.
"Oh yes. It was, and is, all about him."
Papers and books were shuffled feverishly on the table.
Isaac spoke first; his hands had worked better than the others. "Admiral, do you recall what Hitler did as he made the transition from loser to appointed figurehead, to dictator, to fuhrer?"
"Yes. He forced Germany’s military to pledge their allegiance to him."
"To him, not Germany." Isaac paused. "It was the same with Mo."
Joshua waded in. "From the lips of Muhammad: ‘I invite your allegiance, on condition that you undertake to protect me as you would your own families.’ For this, Admiral, he guaranteed them a free pass, direct admission into paradise. Read it and weep. And I ain’t Joshin’."
"No," Yacob chuckled, then coughed in pain. His throat still hurt. "He’s speaking of what’s called the Pledge of Aqaba. The leader of an armed gang said this to Muhammad, and I quote: ‘I will war against all those who fight against you and be at peace with those who are at peace with you.’" Yacob looked back up. "And just so that there’s no confusion, he says that his gang will protect the Apostle with their weapons just as they protected their own women."
Joshua twisted his chair slightly to face Adams. "Der Fuhrer and the Messenger have a great deal in common. They were both compelling orators, charismatic even. Their followers said of each that they were so persuasive, people would swoon in their presence. Yet they were both mercilessly heckled by the establishment, and failed miserably until they plotted a series of violent acts against Jews and other political opponents. They used treaties initially to lull their enemies to sleep before turning, in the end, to all-out war. As you’ll see, both convoluted pre-existing beliefs and preyed on the people’s phobias, jealousies, and prejudices. Muhammad’s ‘struggle in Allah’s cause’ and Hitler’s Mein Kampf - My Struggle - are frighteningly similar."
Adams looked stunned. He knew his friends wouldn’t make something like this up. But comparing the founder of a religion to the most diabolical character in history was hard to swallow.
"Let’s f-forge ahead." Moshe turned to the next page of his notes. "Right from the b-beginning, the Meccans, especially Mo’s Quarish tribe, see our hero and his message as m-madness. Many, if not m-most, believe he’s possessed by a jinn, a d-demon. The Qur’an itself is full of such allegations."
Sarah tried to bite her lip but spoke anyway. "Muhammad was real insecure - paranoid even. He thought everybody was out to get him. The evidence for that in the three books of Islam - the Hadith, the Biographies, and the Qur’an - is overwhelming. He’s constantly attacking his critics, condemning them to hell. The Prophet, like most delusional people, elevated himself by cutting his opponents down. For Muhammad, Islam was all about power and plunder - not faith."
Thor Adams stood and walked to the window. These were words the world wouldn’t want to hear.
She shared, "As God’s Messenger, you’d think he’d try to save folks in his home town, especially his kinsmen. But no. When they criticize him he goes berserk. Insecure people love to dish it out, but they can’t take it. There are forty consecutive surahs in the Qur’an about how Mo’s critics are going to be roasted and toasted. For giggles he condemns their offspring too. He even condemns their ancestors, his ancestors mind you, saying that they’re already burning in hell."
"Sarah’s not making this stuff up, Admiral," the Major said, turning around. "His fixation with hell and punishment is all consuming."
"One of the wealthiest merchants of Mecca said that the Prophet was a magician, a nice way of asserting that he, like his father, was into the occult. So in Qur’an 74:24, a revelation comes to Mo from his spirit friend: ‘The spirit said, "This is nothing but enchantment, the magic of old. This is only the speech of a man. I will cast him into the fire of hell.""
The Admiral nodded as he returned to the table. "So the Prophet is ridiculed; he bears the brunt of some sarcasm from the normally accommodating people of Mecca. It’s hardly persecution." As he talked his gestures became more animated. "But you’re telling me that he cracks under the pressure? Rather than correcting them, trying to win them over, even forgiving them, he condemns them to hell?"
"You’ve got it. The fourth inning is no better than the first three. On the character scale, they’re all strikeouts." Isaac had played ball in America.
Sarah picked up the thought. "The continual sneers exasperated our boy, according to Ibn Ishaq. What I’m going to share with you should tell you all you need to know about the nature of the Prophet. In fact, most everything he does from this point on betrays the character flaw revealed in this story." Nottingly opened one of the books she had brought. "‘While they,’ the Quraish leaders, ‘were discussing him, the Apostle came toward them, kissed the Black Stone and then passed by them as he walked round the Ka’aba. As Muhammad passed, they said some injurious things about him. I could see his expression darken. He passed them a second time and they once again attacked him verbally. Then he passed the third time and they did the same. He stopped and said, "Listen to me, O Quraish. By Him who holds my life in His hand, I bring you slaughter."’"
Thor shook his head. "They taunt him and tease him, and he responds by saying he’s going to slaughter them? Not much of a Prophet. Certainly doesn’t sound like God’s guy to me."
"‘By Him who holds my life in His hand,’" Sarah repeated thoughtfully, "‘I bring you slaughter.’ Who do you think ‘Him’ is?"
Moshe started to laugh.
"What’s so funny?" Yacob asked.
"Oh, it’s just this w-whacked-out verse I found in al-Bukhari’s Hadith. Muslims m-must have a sense of humor."
"What’d you find?"
"Enough s-stuff to keep a p-platoon of comedians employed for a year, but the bit about the ‘Lord of Slaughter’ reminded m-me of a great one. ‘The Prophet was told that a person had k-kept on sleeping till morning and had n-not gotten up for the early morning p-prayer. Allah’s Messenger said, "Satan urinated in his ears."’ As sick as that s-sounds, I didn’t take it out of c-context, and that’s the whole thing. It’s number 605," he said, looking at the paper.
Glancing up and still trying to suppress the urge to laugh, he added, "I wrote it d-down at first because I thought it was so w-weird - so un-prophet-like. But one-handed, it took awhile, and I began to think. Why would Satan be "pissed" about a fellow missing a p-prayer to Allah, since they’re s-supposed to be enemies? So it d-dawns on me - they aren’t."
"Can I get ya’ll a drink?" the Admiral asked, feeling uncomfortable. He took the team’s orders as he shuttled to and from the small kitchen.
Josh jumped back in. "Listen, Satanic or not, the Messenger Boy was just an irritant to the Meccans, nothing more. His reshuffling their god-rocks in the Ka’aba would only have been costly to them if his newfangled way of looking at things caught on. And that didn’t happen. By the time he was fifty, he had less than a hundred converts."
It was Yacob’s turn. "But with us Jews, it’s different. Muhammad went from being an irritant to...well, being lethal. He starts off by basing Islam on Judaism. Most every important Jew makes an appearance in his book. Yet every account is twisted. As an example," he looked down, "in the nineteenth chapter of the Qur’an, Muhammad claims Allah told him that the mother of Jesus was a virgin named Miriam. Simple mistake? In verse 28 he specifically calls her the sister of Aaron. That would make Mary, or Miriam as he called her, thirteen hundred years old when Jesus was born."
"At least it proves the virgin birth was a miracle," Sarah laughed.
"I don’t get it." Adams said, "How can Muhammad say Jesus was virgin-born, and still insist he was just a regular guy?"
"Oh, Allah even claims he spoke in the cradle and from it predicted his own resurrection."
"Well, I’m glad to hear that, ’cause it proves something else."
"What’s that, Admiral?"
"Islam’s not satanic. Satan would have told a more believable story."
Moshe set down his Coke before he choked. "It’s pretty weird that this thing caught on, ’cause Mo c-claims that he, an illiterate m-messenger, has the stories r-right, but that the Jews and Christians, whose history it actually was, g-got them all wrong. His explanation: w-we corrupted our scriptures! Since he couldn’t r-read, how do you suppose he f-figured that out?"
"The blind fellow with Alzheimer’s probably told him as he was translating the Gospels from Greek into Hebrew."
Between laughs, Sarah said, "Y’know, guys, in the Book of Judges the Bible says that the Ishmaelites, within six hundred years of Abraham, a good two thousand years before Muhammad, were already worshipping a moon god. It speaks of the gold crescent ornaments that hung from their Camels’ necks."
That caused Thor to remember something. "Well, at least Mo got one thing right. He said Islam was the original faith of Abraham. Abe came from Ur, in Sumeria, where everybody worshiped the moon god - Sin.
"The moon god, as in Allah, was named Sin?"
"Yep. But I ask you, if Muhammad’s mission was to bring back the religion of Abraham, why didn’t the Muslims roll up their tents and go home, admit that Mo was wrong, when that Bedouin boy found the two- thousand-year-old scrolls at Qumran? The Dead Sea Scrolls prove that the Hebrew scriptures haven’t changed one iota in over twenty-one centuries. Those scrolls prove that the very foundation of Islam is a lie."
"As does the Septuagint," Yacob said. "That was a widely distributed translation of the Hebrew Bible into Greek, produced in Alexandria about 275 B.C."
The Admiral calmed back down. "I dunno. Maybe we should cut the Messenger Boy some slack. He admitted he was illiterate, and the Bible is a written account. Furthermore, it’s God’s relationship with his people, the Jews, not the Arabs. Why should he know these stories? And why should we care if he got them all wrong?"
Josh rose to the occasion. "You can’t cut him slack when he tells his followers to kill us."
The Mossad Major said, "When Muhammad started spewing this rubbish, the Jews in Yathrib laughed at him. Heck, when I read what he said, I laughed at him!"
"Want some examples?" Josh asked, as his friends nodded. "Hadith 1732, or Qur’an 9:30, take your pick. ‘The Jews will be called. They will say they worshiped Ezra,’ of all people, ‘the son of Allah. It will be said, "You are liars"...whereupon they will be gathered into the Hell Fire destroying each other. Afterwards the Christians will be called. They will say, "We worshiped Jesus, the son of Allah." It will be said, "You are liars, for Allah has never taken anyone as a wife or a son"...and they will be thrown into the Hell Fire with the Jews.’"
"Allah has never taken anyone as a wife or a son," Sarah repeated. "Then I suppose Allah’s three daughters were bastards."
"Ouch, girl." Joshua shook his head. "How’s this for revisionist silliness? ‘Allah will ask Noah, "Did you convey Our Message of Islam?" Noah will say, "Yes."’ Or this, ‘We went out with Allah’s Apostle to receive captives...because we desired women and loved to do coitus interruptus.’ I swear, I’m not making this up. Okay, how ’bout this? Muhammad, struggling with his propensity to lie, gave us this little gem. ‘I have never intended to lie...I hope Allah will save me from telling lies the rest of my life. So Allah revealed this verse: "Allah has forgiven the Prophet."’ I suppose that means, ‘You can lie all you like, because I like you.’"
"Or in Allah’s case, I’m like you." Sarah had stumbled onto the truth. "You know, Allah is as different from God as Muhammad is from Jesus."
"Yeah," Josh said, "Muhammad is a veritable treasure trove of hate speech. There are hundreds of hate verses." He glanced down at his notes. "‘The Prophet had their warriors killed and their women and children taken as prisoners.’ And, ‘"O Allah’s Messenger, do you want us to kill or fight anybody?"’ To which the Prophet replied, ‘"Proceed on, in the name of Allah."’ Or perhaps you like this peaceful little pearl from number 1629. Speaking about a village of four thousand people, the Prophet said, ‘"These Jews have agreed to accept your verdict. Kill their men and take their offspring captive."’ Impressed?"
"No. Not surprised, either. The leading imam in Saudi said the same thing recently, as did the Saudi Ambassador to Great Britain. I’ve just learned why."
"The Jews," Isaac added, "didn’t care much for the Prophet. And when it came to his scriptures, they knew that he was making a fool of himself. Naturally, when they corrected him, it made him angry. So, ever in character, Prophet-Man made them pay - made us pay - for his delusions of grandeur and paper-thin skin. We’re still paying today."
"Admiral, if I may," Joshua interjected, "from what I can see, our notes are in chronological order. But Muhammad’s beef with the infidels, especially Jews, is the single most important part of his life as it relates to the fix the world is in. I think we should cover it last."
"Agreed," someone said as all heads nodded.
The Major moved ahead. "Let’s skip the story about how the little clan of Meccan Muslims snuck out of town and headed to Yemen in hopes the Abyssinian Christians would protect them."
"Okay, but it’s important to share what Muhammad told his entourage to say to their Emperor." Sarah looked down and read, "‘We say about Jesus what our Prophet says about him, namely that Jesus is the Servant of God, and an Apostle. God implanted in Mary, the Blessed Virgin, His Spirit and His Word.’"
Thor hit his forehead. "That line alone renders Islam ridiculous. If God implanted his spirit in a virgin, Jesus is God and Islam is a sham. Their position is preposterous. Don’t these people think?"
"Apparently not." Sarah shook her head. "Muhammad says, and I quote, ‘I am the nearest of all the people to the son of Mary...and there has been no Prophet between me and Jesus.’ Then he says, ‘Jesus will judge people by the law of the Qur’an and not by the law of the Gospel.’ First, that’s embarrassing. Being illiterate, Muhammad doesn’t know that the Gospel is the life and lessons of Jesus, not a collection of laws. Second, how can Jesus be nearest to Muhammad as Allah’s prophet if Mo discards and discredits everything he said and did? Finally, how can this second-best prophet judge people by the Qur’an, a book that goes out of its way to call him a liar and his ministry bogus?"
"Speaking of s-stupid," Moshe charged, "listen to this. According to Tabari, the Apostle was reciting chapter f-fifty-three of the Qur’an around the Ka’aba, which at the time was still a wholly-pagan shrine. He reached verse eighteen, and ‘He s-saw one of the greatest signs of his Lord. "Have you considered al-Lat, al-Uzza, and M-Manat?"’ So Tabari says, ‘Satan put into the Prophet’s mind to insert the words, "These are exalted females, whose intercession is to be hoped for."’ The recitation complete, Muhammad prostrated himself. The i-idolaters, delighted at the mention of their three g-goddesses as i-intercessors, prostrated themselves also. So everyone around the Ka’aba was b-butt up to the sky. ‘Muslims and pagans alike, bowed down worshiping together.’"
"Oops," the Admiral chuckled. Then the grin fell from his face. He became serious as he processed the implications of what he’d just heard. This was no laughing matter. "The first part about seeing the greatest signs of his Lord followed by the fact it was Satan speaking says a lot more than I really want to know."
"Oops indeed. The ultimate brain-fart." Sarah hadn’t said it to be funny. Her tone was depressed. The fact that it didn’t sound like her was evidence that she was becoming cynical.
"After t-the Satanic Verses were r-revealed, Muslims hiding out in Abyssinia came scampering b-back, for all was happiness and joy again in Ka’abaville. But Gabriel, we’re told, is m-miffed. He has our boy expunge the S-satanic Verses, blaming Satan himself for infecting the Messenger’s m-mind and putting the heresy in his mouth. The w-words were summarily struck from Allah’s Message, and as a result, the Quraish resumed their v-verbal abuse."
Nottingly concurred. "With the Satanic Verses repealed, the war of words got prickly. Then Islam’s matriarch, Khadija died, leaving Mo all alone with his tormentors. Unimpressed with his demonic indulgence, many of Muhammad’s initial converts started to heckle him. So with the going tough, Mo got going. He skedaddled out of town - decides he needs a little vacation. Anyone want to venture a guess where he went?"
"Right here. Vacation paradise of the world. Book me a flight to the Temple on a mythical buraq, he told his travel agent."
"I guess you’ve heard this one before."
"Yeah, but when the Meccan pagans heard it, they laughed themselves silly. And when his fellow Muslims heard it, many of those who hadn’t already bailed over his brush with Satan recanted their faith. There are dozens of Muhammadisms in the Hadith trying to make sense of this whole affair, but the harder he tries, the more ridiculous he looks."
"Okay, now things start to fall apart," Yacob shared.
"Whoa," Adams interrupted. "Start to fall apart? So far he’s looking like an overturned truckload of camels - humps and bumps everywhere. Nothing but strikeouts through the fifth, according to my scorecard."
"Oh, this is the good part, sir. We’re now in the year 619. Our tarnished and tattered hero is fifty. With his seventy-year-old wife gone, he’s a wreck, totally unable to cope. Like I said, things unravel in a hurry."
"What fool would follow such a fool?"
"Arabs. Within two weeks of Khadija’s death, Mo’s married again. But then his uncle Abu Talib dies. That’s bad, because he was a bigwig in the Meccan community and did a lot to mute some of the criticism that otherwise would have been hurled at Prophet-Man," Isaac explained.
"And w-wouldn’t you know it, even though he was Mo’s p-principle benefactor, he’s burning in h-hell. He was never willing to say the magic words, ‘There is no g-god but Allah and Muhammad is His Messenger.’"
"I guess you’re going to Paradise, Moshe. All you’ve got to do is say the magic words."
"Yeah, b-baby, bring on the virgins."
Sarah feigned a displeased look. "Mo’s bummed," she pressed on, "so he flies the coup. He heads to Talif, fifty miles north, and meets with their honchos. They double over laughing when he tries to convert them, saying, ‘If God needed a messenger, he would have found someone better than you.’"
"Smart boys," Thor suggested.
"Muhammad is crushed, embarrassed really," Sarah went on. "He pleads with the rulers not to tell anyone what he’d tried to do for fear he’ll be ridiculed. They, of course, ignore his request and proceed to lambaste him, stoning him on his way out of town. But he lives through it, ’cause its hard to throw rocks when you’re laughing so hard."
Joshua picked up on the story. "Scared spitless to go back into Mecca, our intrepid Hero sends off a message to some leading idolaters pleading for their protection. Any port in a storm may work for a sailor, but it’s not so good if you’re pretending to be the Messenger of God. They blow him off too. But finally a couple of clansmen in Mecca get word of Mo’s predicament and agree to protect their hometown boy. They march into the Ka’aba square fully armed and announce that the big Mo is under their wing. They’re pagans, mind you, but what’s a Prophet to do?"
"Actually, Josh," Yacob said, "it was the devil’s own deal. In order to earn their protection he had to shut up - no talking. He became the Silent Prophet. Things were looking bleak. He had gone from the embarrassment of the Satanic Verses, to the embarrassment of the Celestial Journey, to the embarrassment of being the first stone worshiper to get stoned, to being the Mute Messenger. His fiftieth and fifty-first years were the pits. There were no new converts. He had blown through the money he’d inherited, blown through his followers, blown his credibility."
"His life was in shambles." Isaac recounted the sorry tale. "Twelve years after the initial cave vision, Islam is looking more like a fiasco than a religion."
"Desperate, Muhammad tries the conversion thing on some pilgrims from Yathrib. Unlike the men of Talif, they don’t laugh in his face. So he presses them for protection, and they trade it for a free pass into paradise. They go back and tell their pals that the Mad Merchant of Mecca is prepared to hang with them so long as they vow to guard his sorry butt. Why someone didn’t ask the obvious questions I’ll never know. Why on earth did the Prophet of the mighty Allah need protection? If Allah likes you so much, why doesn’t he take care of you? Or, if he’s so afraid to die, how can he be our ticket to paradise? But they didn’t, and as a result we start a new chapter."
Moshe shook his head. Lest we f-forget, the Qur’an now needs to be amended to j-justify violence, right? The p-pledge was a call to arms. For the first t-time, Muhammad claims that he gets it on d-divine authority that it’s good to f-fight against anyone who has wronged him. It’s the birth of Jihad."
"You’re making this up, right? If this was a Broadway play, it would’ve closed on the first night." The Admiral thought he had studied Islam, but with every word it was looking like the greatest con ever sold.
"Oh, ye of little faith," Sarah chided him. "We’ve done our homework. With the world hanging in the balance, I’m surprised everyone hasn’t. Now, who wants to read Qur’an 22:39?"
Moshe’s mangled paw went up. "‘Permission is granted to take up arms and f-fight because we have been oppressed. Allah is able to give victory to those who have been expelled from their home.’"
Sarah explained, "The last part’s the killer. He had left Ka’abaville in disgrace because he couldn’t handle the humiliation. Now, according to Allah, the head rock of that same pagan Ka’aba, it’s okay to fight the tribe that created him, worshiped him, and diligently dusted him for centuries - Muhammad’s own tribe, by the way."
"Tail between his l-legs, Messenger Boy sends his entourage, what’s left of it, two hundred and fifty miles north, to Yathrib. It’s a v-veritable garden compared to Mecca, an affluent agricultural c-community. Yathrib has five t-tribes, three of which are Jewish. They’re smart, l-literate, and very p-prosperous. We’re now on a collision course with d-destiny."
"But our hero hangs back for a while," Yacob said. "He lets his pals put their toes on the water. It’s not the best idea he’s ever had, ’cause by this time the Quraish have had their fill of him. They decide - just like today’s consensus-building politicians - that one clansman from each tribe should simultaneously plunge their sword into the weasel. It’s a multinational alliance - so modern of them. But with so many people involved in his assassination, word gets out to the Mighty Mo. Ever the coward, he has someone dress up like him and lie in his bed. Then he slithers out of town and hides in a cave."
"He doesn’t mind murder, so long as it’s not his," Thor moaned. "This guy goes from bad to worse."
"You don’t know the half of it," Yacob snarled. "His stand in, the stooge, is his own adopted son. Some father, this one,"
"Oh, and Admiral," Sarah smiled, "guess where the cave is?"
He just looked at her.
"On Mount Thor."
"Please. Say it ain’t so."
"Look on the bright side. You’ve got a mountain named after you."
"And a weasel hiding in it."
"So the Prophet, after cowering in the cave for three days, finally decides it’s safe to head north, to the Jewish community of Yathrib. While the Muslim accounts are considerably less critical of his behavior, the facts are as we have reported them, sir," Josh said, fingering the depression in his left wrist.
"In Yathrib, he has the followers who preceded him, the ‘emigrants’ as he calls them, build him a home and mosque - Islam’s first. Although in al-Buhkari’s Book of Stories, Muhammad tells a whopper. When asked about the first mosque, he tells his fellow militants that it was really the pagan Ka’aba in Mecca. The second, he said, was built forty years later: Aqsa mosque in Jerusalem. Mo was evidently allergic to truth.
"But not to young girls," Josh continued. "He goes to his best friend, Abu Bekr, and tells him he wants to screw, I mean marry his six-year-old daughter. Mind you, he’s fifty at the time. The biographers say she was a really cute kid, and Muhammad waited until she was nine, but there’s something altogether sick about a fifty-three year old doing it with a nine-year-old girl."
"Yeah," Nottingly cringed. "There’s a word for it - pedophile."
"So Catholic of him."
The Major rolled his eyes. "Even though there are only some seventy Muslim emigrants in Yathrib, they decide to rename the place Medina, the Prophet’s City, in guess-who’s honor. Then Prince Charming tells the Jews in town that the religion he’s selling is the original faith of Abraham, and that he is a Prophet in the line of Moses, Abraham, Adam, Noah, and Jesus. Unfortunately, he doesn’t know which one came first, or that most of those on his list never held the office of Prophet."
"Undeterred," Isaac continued, "Muhammad confirms his ‘Jewishness’ by telling the locals that Muslims bow five times a day facing the holiest place on earth, the Jewish Temple on Mount Moriah. Since he’s been ostracized from Mecca, Ka’aba worship is evidently on the rocks. Not surprisingly, the Jews aren’t impressed, knowing there hasn’t been a Temple there for five and a half centuries."
"Unable to woo converts, der Prophet proposes a non-aggression pact," Sarah said. "Kinda like the one the Nazis offered the Russians. And it worked out every bit as good for the Yathrib Jews, but we’re getting slightly ahead of our story."
"Immediately after f-forming this alliance. Mo gets up on his s-soapbox and tells the Jews his favorite Bible s-stories, b-butchering them all. They laugh and call him s-stupid."
"It gets so ridiculous, the Jews start to make a game out of it. Before Mo even gets settled into his new digs, and with his new, real-new wife, he’s right back were he was in Mecca, a laughingstock."
"For example," Joshua offered, "according to the Hadith, one day Abu Bekr was out begging for money. He said, ‘Who will give Allah a good loan?’ Whereby a passing Jew exclaimed, ‘If your god needs a loan he must be in pretty bad shape,’ or words to that effect. Being the most Muslim of Muslims, Bekr decked him."
"A few days l-later in Qur’an 9:61, Mo is annoyed by s-someone who says he’s g-gullible. The divine voice rushes in to s-save the day, rescuing our hero’s pride. ‘There are some of them who a-annoy the Prophet and say that he believes everything he hears.’ Followed by, ‘There is a painful p-punishment in store for those who a-annoy Allah’s Messenger.’" Moshe’s expression betrayed no amusement.
"Situational scriptures," Josh observed.
"Being an agricultural town," Sarah dove in, "the Prophet often found himself in a pickle, or ‘on a date’, as the case may be." She laughed. "Mo found the process of pollinating date trees repugnant, so he made it a forbidden act for Muslims - part of his religion. The trees, of course, bore no fruit after that, causing the Jews to mock him once again."
Sarah smirked as she shook her head. She knew what happened next. It was so typical of Muhammad. "Tired of being played for a fool by the Jews, the Prophet figures its time for Allah to change his mind. He tells his followers that the bit about Allah wanting five daily prayers and prostrations facing the holy Jewish Temple in Jerusalem was all wrong. So was worshiping on their Sabbath. Now Allah wants them to face his special rock pile, the Ka’aba, and to worship on Friday. Loosely translated, that means, ‘The Jews have yanked my chain one too many times, and we aren’t going to play with them anymore.’"
Moshe, shuffling through his notes, started chuckling to himself.
"More potty talk, Moshe?"
"How’d you know? This one c-comes from al-Bukhari’s True Traditions, verse 119. ‘"Whenever you sit for answering the c-call of nature, you should not face the Ka’aba or Jerusalem. But I saw Allah’s Messenger answering the call while sitting on two b-bricks facing Jerusalem."’ First, the b-boy is way too into the details, and second, it sounds just a touch p-petty, don’t you think?"
"Must sound like scripture to them. They’ve been dumping on the Jews for centuries."
"Good one, Yac."
Moshe wasn’t done. "While on the s-subject, I enjoyed th-this. The Book of Wudu, chapter 3. ‘Muhammad was asked about a person who he imagined to have p-passed wind during the morning prayer. Allah’s Apostle replied: "He should not leave his prayer unless he hears s-sound or s-smells something."’"
"Words to live by." Sarah shook her head. "No question in my mind he was doing Allah a real service."
"Actually, Sarah, service was something Mo got, not did. You know what happens next?"
"Yeah, he was flat broke, so he concocted the perfect revelation. He said that Allah wanted his people to pay a tax - called it ‘alms.’ Then, making sure he would get his even if his faithful starved, he instructed his followers to start observing the pagan tradition of fasting during the idolater’s holy month of Ramadan. Ever in character."
"Unfortunately," observed Yacob, "the Islamic community in Yathrib wasn’t any more productive than Muslims anyplace else, before or since. Taxing them wasn’t the answer. So Allah’s man comes up with a most ‘Profitable’ idea. ‘We’re busted. Others aren’t. Why not steal from them?’"
"Because it would be armed robbery? Because it would be wrong?" Isaac gritted his teeth.
"Mo didn’t look at it that way. He didn’t seem to have a conscience. So he and his ‘faithful’ set out to rob caravans. They became pirates. Failures in the religion thing, they reshaped Islam into an economic doctrine by plundering the wealth of others at sword point. It became the precursor to Fascism and Communism."
"Sad but true," the Major moaned. "And all too soon, the grand scheme of redistributing wealth led to the battle of Bedr."
"Wait, Isaac," Sarah burst in. "Before you tell Thor the story of the grand skirmish in the sand, I need to clarify something. Raiding caravans, plundering, and killing were all rare in Arabia, considered bad form."
"Are you sure about that?" Thor asked. "Muslims claim Muhammad was only doing what every red-blooded Arab did."
"Positive," Yacob pointed out. "There were tribal alliances just to make sure it didn’t happen. Caravans were the foundation of their economy. Heck, Muhammad’s first job was as a salesman on a caravan."
"But there’s more," Josh said. "While the Arabs of Mo’s day thought it was great sport to raid a neighboring village and steal a camel or a goat, they would do anything to avoid killing a person. Murder in the Arab world had to be avenged. It was, and continues to be, a messy business. When Mo did it, it was a criminal act. And because the victims were always civilians, it was a terrorist act."
"But it was hardly the most ungodly thing he ever did," Adams said.
"No, but it was w-wrong. He knew it, and yet he did it. In fact, until he became a p-pirate, his prophet gig was on the r-rocks. Afterwards he really was a P-R-O-F-I-T."
"So rare was raiding caravans," Yacob laughed, "the Profit’s first nine attempted robberies were a bust. Then finally, in the pagans’ sacred month of Rejeb, his armed marauders found and attacked a small caravan, murdering one man and taking two more hostage. They carted the booty and prisoners back to Muhammad, who was horrified when he discovered they had done the deed during the idolaters’ holy month. He was so upset, he refused to accept the plunder."
"Yeah, but then the heavenly dinner bell rang in the Profit’s head," Sarah suggested. "It said, ‘Are you stupid, or what? You’re busted, flat broke. You’re our boy; we’ll cut you some slack. Create a loophole for conscientious objectors.’ Okay, that was a paraphrase," she grinned. "Rocks can’t talk." So she quoted directly from the Qur’an: "‘If they ask you about fighting in the sacred month, say: Fighting in it is an important matter, but preventing men from following the way of Allah and denying access to the sacred mosque and turning people out of it - with Allah, these are more important still, and schism is more important than killing.’
"The mosque Allah’s speaking of is his rock garden, the Ka’aba, in which he’s still the biggest of some three hundred and sixty stone idols. According to Mo, Allah’s saying it’s a-okay to pocket the loot because those bad boys down in Mecca shooed him away from his rock. And that just isn’t fair. The rift, or schism, is so dastardly, in fact, Allah says that it’s good to kill them. How’s that for situational scriptures?"
"Bottom line," Josh offered, "is that Chairman Mo, now with the rock’s blessing, pockets his share of the booty, dividing the rest up equally among his comrades. Muslim militants had scored their first kill. But, it wouldn’t be their last. Jihad was born. Holy War. Check this verse out. It’s from The True Traditions. ‘Allah’s Messenger was asked, "What is the best deed?" He replied, "To believe in Allah and His Messenger." "What is next in goodness?" Muhammad answered, "To participate in Jihad - to fight in Allah’s Cause."’
"One would think," Adams offered, "that if you were to go about creating a religion you could do a whole lot better job. Heck, this sounds more like the gospel according to Attila the Hun. ‘Hitler’s Helpful Hints’ would be better than this garbage."
"Hitler’s Helpful Hints?" someone repeated, laughing.
"Fact is, sir, it’s not a religion. It’s a doctrine, like Communism and Fascism. Worse still, it’s a manifesto for war."
With so much to cover, Moshe just looked down at his notes and plowed ahead. "The b-big one was just on the horizon. In January 624, the Moon-God’s fifty-four-year-old Messenger Boy c-coveted a colossal prize. He knew that if he could snag a full-fledged c-caravan carrying goods from a variety of m-merchants, he would instantly solve his financial w-woes and properly equip his arsenal. That first score w-was just an appetizer.
"But he failed. So the f-following March, he and three hundred of his marauders h-headed out again. Eighty of them were ‘Emigrants,’ Muslims from Mecca. The remainder were ‘Helpers,’ as he called them. They were along for their share of the l-loot. Together, Helpers and Emigrants all shuffled off, battle flags flying. But they looked better than they felt. The Emigrants were troubled about the prospects of k-killing their fellow Quraish tribesmen. Even p-pagans abhorred killing - especially k-kin."
Sarah took over. "God’s Messenger, however, didn’t mind. He was trying to break down tribal and family loyalties replacing them with total devotion to himself. In the Book of Belief, Allah’s Boy said, ‘You will not have ‘faith’ until you love me more than your parents and children.’"
"Well," Isaac pressed on, "living in poverty, the young men jumped at the chance. They had nothing to lose. All they owned was a sword, and they were more than ready to wield it to avenge their grievances and line their pockets."
"Some things never change. They sound like today’s bad boys."
Sarah nodded. "As focused on plunder as he was, Muhammad on the battlefield was something of a problem. So on the eve of the skirmish, they built the ‘general’ a shelter out of palm fronds, allegedly so he could be comfortable and make a rapid escape should the festivities not go according to plan. Of course, it may just have been to keep him out of their way. We’ll never know."
"Thor, the battle of Bedr is the turning point for Islam. It explains why we’re still dealing with his followers today."
"Alright, Isaac. Tell me how war made a religion."
"A doctrine, sir, not a religion." He looked stern. "It began with a test between champions. The defeated Islamic swordsman’s dying words were, ‘Am I not a martyr, O Messenger of Allah?’ To which Muhammad replied, ‘Indeed you are.’ We have our first applicant for Muhammad’s rendition of paradise.
"Then to rally his troops, der Prophet promised them all the same thing. He cried out, ‘Every man killed today will instantly be admitted into Paradise.’ To which one of the youngest swordsmen replied, ‘What! Is there nothing between me and Paradise but to be killed by these men?’ He seized his sword, plunged himself into the battle, and was killed.’ Guess where he is today," Isaac pondered.
"Scratching his head with all of the other boy bombers," the Admiral grumbled, "trying to figure out what went wrong."
Isaac returned to the Battle of Bedr. "Not accustomed to fighting, the overly accommodating Quraish, the peace-loving Meccan Merchants, put themselves at a disadvantage. They faced a blinding sun in a valley, looking up at their adversary. They tried to advance over soft dunes. And then, to make matters worse, they were downwind. A squall whipped up some sand, blasting it in their faces.
"Muhammad, as you might have guessed, sitting back in the comfort of his palm-frond hut, cried enthusiastically, ‘It’s Gabriel! He, with the help of a thousand angels, is falling upon the enemy! He is throwing sand in their faces.’"
"Oh, good grief."
"Can you imagine a god so destitute he had to send his top angel to help pirates steal other people’s money? Or angels so feeble it takes a thousand of them to subdue a hundred merchants?"
Thor shook his head in amazement. He prayed they were making this up. His prayer was not answered.
"When the sand finally settles, about fifty Meccans are dead, and a similar number are taken prisoner. The Muslims admitted losing fourteen. It was a meaningless skirmish by any standard. Yet it transformed Islam. Over three years it had evolved from an egotistical charade, to a silly religion, to plundering-pirate gig, to a killing machine. Which is where it remains today.
"Muhammad reveled in killing. It got so bad, he sent one of his servants out to search for the corpse of a man who had upset him when he was in Mecca. Finding it, he severed his head and tossed it at the Prophet’s feet. Muhammad cried, ‘The head of the enemy of God. Praise Allah.’"
"The enemy of God? This guy’s beyond belief. It’s no wonder they celebrate killing," Adams noted.
"The prisoners were carted off, Admiral. They would be ransomed - all but three anyway. A couple said that their stories were better than der Prophet’s, so he cut off their heads too. Another was hacked to pieces by a vengeful lad who viewed him as an unworthy infidel.
"The victims cried out in anguish, ‘Who will look after our children, O Muhammad. But Hitler’s mentor was unmoved. ‘Hell Fire,’ he said. Do you think our boy may have been a touch vindictive?" the Major asked.
"Perhaps just a smidge. But still, associating the leader of a ‘religion’ with der Fuhrer, may be a bit over the top."
"He earned it," Isaac shot back. "Now back in the pirates’ den, the rebels started to quarrel about who was going to get the most booty. It was a mutiny in the making. Those who killed a man felt that they were entitled to his sword and shield. However, those in the rear guarding the Mighty Mo felt left out. They hadn’t come along for the fun of it, and they demanded their share. So the Prophet, displaying the wisdom of Lenin, had all the stolen loot piled up. After taking twenty percent for himself, he distributed the rest equally among his bloody, sword-wielding ‘religious’ stalwarts."
Looking up from his notes, Isaac summarized, "So it was and so it would be. Muslim raids from that time on would divide the spoils in like fashion. It was great for recruiting. The workers’ paradise for those who died, loot for those who lived."
"Sure beats trying to do it the old-fashioned way, evangelizing. You know, trying to convince people that your faith is worthy of their soul."
"As you might imagine, my friend, Muhammad’s alter ego, Allah, condoned the whole sordid affair in a revelation to his Profit." The Major read in the Qur’an’s eighth surah: "‘They ask you about the spoils of war. Say: The profits belong to Allah and to the Apostle. So fulfill your obligations to Allah, settle your disputes, and obey His Apostle.’ Then the Qur’an says, ‘I am reinforcing you with a thousand angels.’ And, finally, ‘He who turns his back in battle shall meet with the anger of Allah and his abode shall be hell.’
"You like probabilities, Admiral. What do you think the odds are that the creator of the universe actually revealed any of this to Muhammad?"
"About one chance in ten to the sixtieth power?"
They all nodded their heads.
"Bedr. In an hour’s time, a ragtag gang of misfits were transformed into military conquerors. Their pride swelled, and so did their numbers. A failure as a prophet, Chairman Mo was now victorious as a terrorist."
Isaac looked back down at his notes. "They stole a hundred and fifty camels, ten horses, and a considerable stash of weaponry. The ransoms paid for the prisoners were even more valuable."
"It’s enough to make you puke," Adams said.
"Well, if you liked that, you’ll love this. The most prolific poet of her day wrote something critical about Profit’s new career path. Muhammad didn’t like it, so he had her murdered in her bed, surrounded by her children. A week later, he did the same to another poet. How’s that for press censorship? When anyone wrote about the inappropriateness of his behavior, he had them assassinated. Hitler had nothing on this guy. Even today, threatening writers remains standard operating procedure for Muslims the world over. It all started with Muhammad."
"No wonder they’re terrorists. Their Prophet was a terrorist." Thor pounded his fist on the table. "I don’t know how much more of this I can stomach," he confessed to his friends.
"I’m sorry," Isaac replied, "but we can’t stop now. This is too important. Of the billion Muslims, over half are young, impressionable, and indoctrinated. They’re old enough to fight, and foolish enough to die. If someone like you, someone people trust, isn’t willing to speak out against this demented doctrine and rally others to stand up, we’re going to find ourselves embroiled in world war."
"It looks inevitable." Thor closed his eyes. He wanted to wish it all away. He had so much to live for. He said a prayer, barely audible.
Everyone realized what Thor was up against. Those who had clawed their way to power in the Muslim world would treat him as their Prophet had treated his critics. They would make Thor Adams’ life a living hell, if only to dissuade others from rallying to his side, from telling the truth about Islam. Even if they didn’t kill him, they would most certainly assassinate his character.
"The next thing Muhammad does sounds a lot like Islamic dictators today. He uses the money he’s stolen from productive people to employ his own journalists. We have our first official state-run media. Needless to say, these poets have only nice things to say about Chairman Mo, and flaming arrows for anyone with the cajones to criticize him."
Moshe was the next to speak. "There’s something y-you ought to know about his f-first encounter with his house poet. When the Apostle asked Thabit if he could d-defend him from the verbal attacks of his enemies, the p-poet stuck out his tongue and said, ‘There is no armor which I cannot p-pierce with this weapon.’"
"You’re not making this any easier."
"Hang in there, my friend. It only gets worse."
"As you might have guessed, things get nasty between the Prophet and the Jews," Sarah shared. "They don’t buy into his warmongering-kidnapping-terrorist-pirate thing any more than they do his bogus Biblical accounts. Immersed in their scriptures, the Jews continued to snicker at Messenger-Man. Unfortunately, they had no idea how evil he was, and they were ill prepared to fight him."
"Good grief. This sounds like a prelude to Hitler and the Holocaust."
"Yep." She went on. "A carbon copy, exactly thirteen hundred years in advance. You could call it a dress rehearsal."
"Enough to make you triskaidekaphobic," Thor noted wryly.
Sarah smiled. "Running low on cash again, Messenger-Man tuned in to his spirit friend for this handy Qur’an revelation: ‘Say to those who disbelieved,’ in me and my doctrine is the inference, ‘"You will be defeated and driven into Hell, an evil resting place."’ So with Allah firmly in his pocket, Mo and his mercenaries march against Yathrib’s first Jewish tribe, the Beni Qainuqa. They lay siege to their settlement. After two weeks, the Jews, without anything to eat or the means to fight back, surrender.
"Ibn Ishaq tells us one of their supporters, with the unlikely name of Abdulla, goes to the Prophet and says, ‘O Muhammad, deal kindly with these people,’ but the Apostle turned his back and became so angry, Ishaq says, that his face turned almost black. Then what do you think happened?"
"Prophet Vision?" Thor ventured.
"Bimbo." Yacob said, winking at Sarah.
"Surah 5:51." She quoted, "‘O you who believe, do not take Jews and Christians as allies. They are friends of one another. Whoever takes them as friends is one of them. And their hearts are affected with sickness....’"
"Oh, man! Like the Nazis telling folks, ‘If you stand up for the Jews you’ll share the same fate!"
"Sounds like hate speech to me," Joshua proclaimed.
"Then fasten your seatbelt," Nottingly said. "Verse 57 is pure unadulterated, insecure, thin-skinned Mo-babble. Speaking of the Jews, the People of the Book in Yathrib, he claims the bell tolls for them: ‘O Muslims, do not take as allies those who received the Books before you, those who make a sport of your faith and treat your religion as a joke.’"
Yacob looked at Thor. "Like we said, sir, Muhammad was a wannabe Jew who embarrassed himself with silly renditions of our history and faith. If he had just invented his own religion, instead of coveting ours, the Jews in Yathrib would never have teased him. He wouldn’t have lashed out, and we wouldn’t be having this conversation today because there would be no Muslim militants."
The latest in the group to have been injured by Islamic terrorists stood and faced her friends. "In Qur’an 3:3 Allah ‘confirms the Books revealed before; indeed Allah has revealed the Torah and the Gospel.’ Mo said he was just one of the Jews - one with Abraham, Noah, Moses, Jacob, Joshua, David, and Jesus. A fellow prophet. Then he usurped their stories. In fact, if you were to remove four things from the Qur'an - Hebrew Bible stories, pain for anyone who makes a game of Mo’s version, Muhammad’s un-prophet-like behavior having the Good-Ka’aba-Keeping Seal of Approval, and mindless repetition - you’d have nothing left."
Sarah brushed her hair back, gazing deeply into each of her friend’s eyes. "Muhammad condemned himself when he said that the Hebrew Bible and Christian Gospels were both God’s word and wrong. Thinking men and women of his day knew he was crazier than a bed bug, a fraud who was just making it up as he went along, in today’s parlance, a con artist. But rather than admit he was wrong when he was challenged, he killed thinking people instead. He even ordered his followers to do likewise, to the end of time."
Every member of Team Uniform was focused on Sarah. "Muhammad was the inverse of Jesus. He turned what should have been a simple relationship between God and man into a hate-driven, money-grubbing doctrine, replete with befuddling ritual and repressive laws. His line, ‘The retribution for those who fight Allah and me, for those who commit such horrors, is to be crucified,’ defined him and his doctrine. In that light, let’s examine what Muhammad did next."
Moshe took the floor. He was an expert when it came to Muslims torturing Jews. "Thanks to some fortuitous ‘scripture’, Muhammad now had Allah’s permission to kick the Jews out of their h-homes and into the desert. At sword point he commanded the d-defenseless Jewish tribe of Beni Qainuqa to leave all that they owned to him. They were perhaps three thousand strong, outnumbering their assailants many times over. They had l-lived peaceably in Yathrib all their lives. They had built things w-worth owning. Yet it was all t-taken away by a hateful man and his ragtag assemblage of well-armed m-misfits. They had waltzed into t-their town because they had been laughed out of their own. Muhammad’s Muslim militants proceed to s-steal every Jewish possession."
"They were forced to leave their property behind," Josh said. "True to form, the peace-loving and tolerant Islamic faithful confiscated everything, dividing their homes and wealth among them. This was particularly sad because up to this point, the Muslim emigrants from Mecca had been flops in business. They had survived on the charity of their hosts. Now they were celebrating their departure, rolling in the plunder, sleeping in their benefactors’ beds."
"As the Communists and Fascists proved, it’s still possible today. A tiny minority, properly armed and motivated, can bring any nation to its knees." the Admiral muttered to no one in particular.
"In May 624, Muhammad storms off again," Newcomb told the assembled. "He leads a raid on two nomadic tribes, stealing some five hundred camels. I bring this up because a Jewish poet named al-Ashraf criticized the Prophet’s despicable behavior. Perturbed, Maniacal-Man asked his fellow raiders, ‘Who will rid me of al-Ashraf?’ A boy replied, ‘I will kill him for you.’ To which Muhammad said, ‘Do so if you can.’ ‘I will have to tell lies to get it done,’ the would-be assassin confessed to his religious leader. ‘You are authorized to lie,’ Muhammad replied."
"A license to kill - a license to lie. This is some religion. It certainly explains their behavior though, doesn’t it?"
Josh finished the story. "We’re told that Muhammad’s hit man - okay, hit boy - goes off and spends a pleasant afternoon reciting poetry with his intended victim. After dark he slits al-Ashraf’s throat. When Muhammad heard this, Ibn Ishaq says, he told his faithful to, and I quote, ‘Kill any Jew who falls into your control.’"
"But I keep hearing, ‘Islam is peace-loving religion - we all worship the same God.’"
"Must be the Nazi god, ’cause he wants ’em to k-kill Jews."
Thor looked around the room, studying everyone’s face. "They have a clear mandate from Muhammad to lie, steal, and kill."
"I’m afraid we’re not done, Admiral. When one of Muhammad’s followers heard him say this, he immediately went out and murdered a Jewish merchant in Yathrib. His brother protested, saying, ‘Why did you kill him? He was your employer!’ To which the terrorist, Jewish blood still dripping from his hands, boasted, ‘Had the one who told me to kill him ordered me to murder you instead, I would have cut off your head.’"
"Sounds just like intifada."
"That’s because they’re all singing from the same hymnal."
"One of life’s great ironies," Sarah suggested, "is that those who take what rightly belongs to others have no appreciation for its value. Muhammad’s gluttonous marauders always seemed to need ever-larger and more frequent fixes. So with the Great-Religious-One at their side, they set off with reckless abandon, raiding caravans and villages. The richest caravan ever seized was robbed by Mo’s adopted son. Stealing was considered such a good thing, in fact, the Prophet eventually stole his son’s wife. There’s even a verse in the Qur’an condoning his incest."
"Mo’s Marauders became a different breed. Something in his life and words changed the hearts of boys, turning them into killers, thieves, and kidnappers. He convinced Arabs that Allah not only condoned this behavior, but actually rewarded it. And they bought it, which is more insane."
The Major moved on to the next battle. "The merchants in Mecca had finally had their fill of caravans being plundered. So they sent out another assemblage of sword-wielding shop owners to Yathrib - or Medina, whatever you want to call it - to do battle. We’re told Mo wanted to hide, hoping they would go away. But the youngest men in his emerging terrorist network wanted to go out and play. They believed their fearless leader would call in a thousand angels again to throw sand in the merchant’s faces, as he had at Bedr. But it didn’t quite work out that way. Muhammad’s mob was defeated.
"The Muslim militants were massacred. Mo was knocked unconscious early on and left for dead. Unfortunately, he wasn’t," Isaac said. "And the Meccans, being as good at this as Bush One, simply left. They thought they had taught the bad boys a lesson, so they packed up and went home."
"There’s a line from this battle I just love." Josh smiled. "One of the biographers writes, ‘Seized with sudden panic, the Apostle’s warriors rush past him in full retreat.’ To which Muhammad cried out passionately, ‘Where are you going? Come back here. I am the Messenger of God.’ But no one, he says, took notice."
"‘The Messenger of God’ - sure you are, pal."
"I think I know the reason they lost." Sarah had studied this. "When Islam was a just silly religion, only ‘true believers’ followed Messenger-Man. Darn few, it turns out. But when Islam became the ticket to paradise and plunder, the sincerity of the adherents was less genuine, although their numbers swelled. At the first sign of trouble, the hypocrites, as Mo called them, ran. The same is true today. Remember Iraq’s Republican Guards? They couldn’t surrender fast enough. The same could be said of the Taliban."
Yacob looked up from his notes. "The two most interesting tidbits here are Mo’s stirring words, ‘I swear I will mutilate thirty Quraish in revenge.’ And in chapter 3 of the Qur’an, Mo, ever in character, justifies the fact that Gabe and his angels stayed home. ‘We cause days like this to occur so that Allah may know who the believers are and that He may harvest martyrs from among you.’ The ultimate situational scripture."
"Well, s-so as not to make Muhammad l-look like he got run over by the M-Merchants of Mecca, Bukhari reports, ‘I saw Allah’s Messenger on the day of the battle accompanied by two men f-fighting on his behalf. They were dressed in w-white and were fighting with extreme bravery. It is said they were the angel Gabriel a-and the angel Michael.’ ’Course, since they lost, what does that say about Allah’s angels?"
Isaac continued without comment, "Now purely a terrorist, Maniacal-Man sends out one raiding party after another to assassinate his political enemies, principally chiefs and poets. When each assassin returns, Allah’s Apostle praises him for his devotion. Nothing has changed, my friends. And if you don’t think so, listen to al-Jazeera sometime."
Moshe flipped pages. "Here it is in his own w-words. ‘Allah’s Messenger said, "I have been made victorious with t-terror."’ You’ll f-find this in Bukhari’s Book of Jihad, 56:1279, if you want to look it up yourself."
"I think I need a drink."
"Shaken, not stirred?" Nottingly teased. "Sip on this. Mo needs an easy score to reclaim his tattered reputation, not to mention bucks to keep his little band of thieves together. So der Prophet turns his attention to the second Jewish tribe living in Yathrib/Medina. First, he surrounds them. Then he cuts down their date palms, their food supply, something even his own people know is insane. But Mo’s cool with it. See, he had Allah’s blessing. Qur’an chapter 59 says so. ‘Whatever palm tree you cut down or leave standing up, it is by permission of Allah, that He might shame the evildoers.’
"After a siege of two weeks, the defenseless and starving Jewish Beni al Nadheer tribe surrenders, expecting to be driven at sword point into the desert. Muhammad feels a twinge of embarrassment. He’s done this trick before. So he comes up with a handy scripture, ‘It was Allah who drove out the unbelievers, the People of the Book, from their homes in the first banishment.’ Either he forgot about his armed assault and siege, or else he’s admitting what I’ve known for some time: he’s Allah."
Moshe glared down at his mutilated hand. "With the p-productive people gone, the p-parasites sucked up the spoils. As was the custom, they divided the land, homes, farms, shops, and personal b-booty between them, as always giving Pirate-Man his twenty percent c-cut off the top."
"I hate to correct you, Mosh," Yacob interrupted, "but this time, because Muhammad was able to confiscate the Jew’s property without fighting, the Prophet took all the spoils. It’s a story as old as time. If you want to know what’s happening or why - follow the money." He turned to Adams and quoted surah 59. "‘You did not charge with horse or camel so whatever booty Allah gives his Apostle from the [Jewish] tribes is for Allah and His Apostle.’"
Sarah took the last sip of her Diet Coke. "Insecurity is the root cause of all this. Mo’s grew out of his troubled childhood. Like all who suffer from insecurity, Muhammad simply manufactured whatever lie was necessary to take what didn’t belong to him. Allergic to criticism, he was fixated on punishing his tormentors. He would stop at nothing to satisfy his sexual appetite, his craving for power, and his lust for money."
Adams cringed. He knew about insecure people. They were the most destructive parasites on the planet.
Sarah continued. "Insecure men are trouble around women. They’re either abusive or insatiable. The latter was the case with our man-child. He had as many as a dozen wives at a time. One was twice his age. Another was less than one fifth as old as he was. He married a cousin and stole his adopted son’s wife. Plus, he had a plethora of concubines, sex slaves from his conquests."
"He’s forgiven for such indulgences, of course," the Major told the Admiral. "Muslims like to point out that both David and his son Solomon eventually had harems."
"While true," Yacob said, "God withdrew from them when they did. Their lives became unproductive, and they died in sorrow. Solomon’s book, Ecclesiastes, is a treatise on the vanity, the futility, of such a lifestyle."
"Although the Qur’an prohibited much of what Allah’s Messenger did, there was always a new scripture," Josh knew. "He was an exception to his own rules. In one place the Qur’an limits the number of wives to four. In another it says, ‘O Prophet! We have made it lawful for you to possess as many wives as you wish, but that this is a privilege for you alone.’ To which his youngest wife, Aisha responded, ‘Your Lord certainly seems anxious to gratify your desires.’"
"She’s so perceptive! I’m getting to like her."
"Ah well, he liked the girls, too. In fact, Muhammad once said, ‘I like women and perfume better than anything else,’" Sarah quoted.
"Great. Allah likes fights and Muhammad likes sex. War and Booty."
Isaac laughed. "We have one last episode to share with you, Admiral. And as you might imagine, it isn’t pretty." Once again, the Major led the charge. "Muhammad ran into Gabriel, who said, ‘The angels have not laid down their arms. Allah commands you, Muhammad, to go to Beni Quraidha,’ the last remaining Jewish tribe in Medina. ‘I am going there myself.’ So with orders from ‘god’ to harass his chosen people, der Prophet lays siege to Yathrib’s last remaining Jewish tribe - his final solution. Starving and defenseless, they, as those before them, ultimately capitulate, expecting to be deported from their homes."
"But this time Allah’s boy is in a f-foul mood." Moshe completed the story. "He says y-yes, but then at the same moment d-draws his forefinger across his throat, signifying that they should all be m-massacred." Moshe tried to act out Muhammad’s signal, but his mutilated hand wouldn’t comply. "The Prophet said, ‘Allah gives the judgment that the men should all be killed, their p-property divided, and the women and children shall be sold into s-slavery.’"
Isaac related the grim aftermath. "Trenches were dug during the night near the main market of Medina. The Jews were led out in small batches, we’re told. Their hands were tied behind their backs. They were made to kneel down beside the trenches." He paused, unable to go on.
Yacob picked up the story. "Muhammad ordered his men to sever their heads." He involuntarily touched the gash Halam Ghumani had gouged into his throat. "The peace-loving Muslims did as their Messenger instructed. They drew their swords and raised them to the sky as the manacled men awaited their fate. One by one, they did the despicable deed. Heaving their swords down, they hacked off each head, laughing as they tossed one after another into the trench. Others pushed their mutilated bodies into the pit, singing ‘Allahu-akbar.’ He bowed his head.
"He taught them to be t-terrorists. Surah 8:60 - ‘Prepare against the infidels whatever weapons you can muster, that you may strike terror into the enemies of Allah.’"
Josh groaned as he moved in his chair. His chest still hurt. "Eight hundred Jewish men were slaughtered that day. Many times more than that were sold into slavery. The money from the slave trade, along with what they confiscated from homes and businesses, was used to buy more weapons to continue the rule of terror."
Thor sat there, stunned. "Holocaust."
"Yes, one justified by Islamic scripture."
"So Allah approves mass murder."
"Indeed. In Qur’an, chapter 33 Allah said, "‘Remember the blessing of Allah. We sent a wind against them, invisible troops.’ Then, ‘Allah drove back the unbelievers in their rage and they gained no advantage. Allah was mighty and glorious. He brought low the People of the Book, and filled their hearts with dread so that you could kill some and make many captive. Allah made you inherit their lands, mansions, and wealth.’"
Yacob put his hand to his mouth and doubled over. He stood, stumbled off to the bathroom, and lost a perfectly good breakfast. Moshe was paralyzed, consumed with rage. His life bore the scars of Muhammad’s legacy. The Admiral was nauseous. Sarah wept.
Isaac gritted his teeth, mustering the strength to continue. "Mo’s marauders went on to exterminate and rob other tribes, all with the Prophet’s blessing. Muhammad pursued the Beni Nadheer - the second Jewish tribe he’d exiled - killing every male above the age of twelve, raping the women, and selling the children into slavery. Tabari says that Muhammad even ordered their chief tortured hoping to find hidden treasure. In December 627, a raiding party captured some women and children. They raped them as the Apostle watched. They became sex slaves. A new form of booty."
"According to Ibn Ishaq, the Prophet took the most beautiful woman they captured for himself. In the Book of Prayer, number 243, it’s reported this way: ‘Muhammad came with his army and conquered, taking captives and war booty. A follower asked, "O Allah’s Messenger, give me a slave girl from the prisoners." The Prophet answered, "Go and take any one you desire." He picked a beautiful Jewish princess.’ But, we are told, the Prophet coveted her. He reneged on his gift, and took her for himself. The story goes on, but I think we’ve said enough."
"Did you ever wonder why no Muslim nation allows anyone to criticize the Prophet? Why they’ll kill you if you do?" the Major asked his friend.
"I did. Not anymore."
"You may think, sir, that we’ve only given you one side of the story, that Muhammad’s got to have some redeeming qualities. Am I right?"
"Nothing is black and white," Thor admitted. "But I’m afraid there’s more than enough black here to condemn this guy a hundred times over." He stood and faced the window, contemplating the Dome of the Rock.
"Gentlemen, Sarah, you’ve given me all I need to know to see the stone that became Allah, the snatch-and-run that became Islam, and Muhammad, the Prophet of Doom, for what they are - a false god, the surrender to a false doctrine, and a false prophet - a terrorist. You documented everything you’ve said from their scriptures. And you’ve traced the deviant behavior of the Muslim militants directly to Muhammad. The world needs to hear this: Islam itself is the putrid spring from which terrorism flows."